“Soft Living” A Gentle Guide to Restorative Evenings and Cozy Rituals
Last week's post explored the intersection of wellness and
homemaking
as an architecture of well-being…That reflection led me to thinking deeply about a personal value I hold close to me—creating my own sense of personal intimacy within my home.
There is something oh so sacred about having a place where one can unwind and simply be in stillness, alone, at least in my preferred case. As a woman especially, I feel that my self-care days play a vital role in my feeling rooted at home IN my body.
Savoring the Senses: Intimacy Through Presence
Creating personal intimacy, soft living, self care, whatever it may be called is essential to me, and I imagine many of you feel the same. Or, perhaps you might not realize how deeply you could resonate with it yourself if you tapped into this energy and incorporated it into your homemaking practices.
This concept is about slowing down and fully engaging one’s senses, savoring simple particular moments that bring you deep satisfaction, and feeling deliciously present. I believe there are real physiological benefits to this mode of being… It’s as if my sacral chakra is glowing and indulging in the richness of life. Scent, touch, sight, and sound—these sensory gateways are at the heart of soft living.
Aromatherapy as Atmosphere
Incense is one of my favorite things ever…It actually never ceases to fascinate me. Sometimes I fall off my self care home intimacy practices, including simple pleasure that ground me, such as incense burning. Then I will suddenly get the idea to initiate this small pleasure again after arriving at a state where I feel stagnant and cluttered. Honestly friends, I know it sounds dramatic, but the way I can feel my mood lift as I escape into a sensual imaginative cloud of being in my own perfect shuttered den.
Aromatherapy is undeniably powerful, I won’t pretend to be an expert on the science, but it’s clear that scents deeply impact us—grounding and soothing us.
Aromatherapy, especially burning candles or incense, deeply enhances the sensory experience of soft living. The act alone fills my space with warmth, it evokes coziness and grounding as well making me feel more embodied and at peace in my environment.
The Healing Power of Sound and Music
Another essential component of soft living for me is sound therapy. Music, in particular, affects me profoundly. I’ve often wondered why we as humans respond to it so strongly—it moves me, connects me, and stirs my senses. At times, it feels like a creative river flowing through me, unlocking something intuitive and sacred that allows me to connect to others in an ethereally emotional way. Personally, that very thing is very nurturing to a soft emotional girl like me.
Beyond that, music gives me a sense of communion with humanity, it's one of the most raw expressions of the soul’s essence. Singing, sound, and rhythm, they all tap into something deeply personal and quite literally therapeutic. I consider it to be a poetic and intimate form of socializing. When I’m at home alone in soft-living self-care mode, you best believe that candles are lit, music is flowing, and incense is dancing in the air…I feel so centered and indulged within these moments, this to me, is
homemaking at its most intimate.
Cozy Home Decor: Curating Emotional Aesthetics
Home decor, too, can help play a significant role in curating this soft living ambiance at home. I am so happy about this aspect of homemaking because I really feel my creativity come to life. Little knickknacks, cozy items, sentimental touches, they can all work in tandem to help shape the emotional landscape of a room.
Recently, on Pinterest, I was scrolling and came across a ceramic mug molded with little cats all around it, and something about the image sparked such a warm cozy feeling… I wanted to be curled up in the very same plush cream chair with that very cup warming my hands. It reminded me how beauty and comfort can very much be curated by our physical environment.
This led me into a Pinterest spiral, where I found the perfect coffee table setup: neatly stacked coffee table books, the glow of candlelight, and a ceramic ash or incense tray carved with cozy sleeping cats in the middle. The scene exuded comfort, and I wanted to jump right in—curl up in my comfy PJs, hair down, candles burning, takeout on its way, and a movie queued ready. That, to me, is a delicious evening.
Rituals of Soft Living
Slowing down is the heart of soft living and self care. One of my most cherished rituals is something I do often, not because it’s healthy or productive, but because it makes me feel good. It reminds me why I love having my own space, and yes, it usually always includes music and aromatherapy.
This ritual came to mind while I was getting a friend’s input for this week's post's content and title. She was initially unsure what I meant by “soft living” or “curating a cozy vibe”, but when I described it, she lit up. She said it reminded her of being alone, in pajamas, music playing, moody lighting, all the cozy intimate ingredients, and I thought “yes! that’s exactly it!”
Picture this: I’m in my bathroom, doors closed, and lights off because I have multiple candles burning, while I’m in the steaming shower and music is blaring. See I can be somewhat intense in that I like being bombarded through my senses, so sometimes incense swirls through the air too. A thick vibe of a cloud that’s warm, intimate, and a delicious sensory cocoon.
When I described this to my friend, she said while looking entranced, “That sounds amazing,” and I couldn’t agree more. That’s the energy I want to share with you in this post, these rituals are restorative, they anchor us and connect us to our homes in new loving ways.
The Sacred Act of Staying In
If you’ve ever questioned the purpose of your home, or longed to feel more rooted & emotionally grounded in it, this is your invitation. Soft living can surely be a way to gently guide you there.
No need to feel deprived or get FOMO when you're considering choosing to stay in for an evening, instead of going out. It's nourishment and a conscious investment in yourself. So maybe this week, or one evening soon, you let yourself indulge. You stay in and create something tender. You light a candle, play your favorite music, breathe in the scent of something beautiful, and truly unwind in the moment.
There’s something extremely human about this. Yes, we’re intelligent, enlightened beings…but we’re also primal, sensory creatures with electric signals, hormones, and instincts. We simply need the things that our nature demands, rituals in the home satisfy both our higher thinking and organic earthly needs. When we honor that side of us through soft living, we remind ourselves that joy and stillness are not only allowed, but essential.
So this is your reminder, indulge your sensual and soft side by leaning into your home environment. Nurture yourself, ground your senses, find the rhythm of
soft living. Make it delicious and make it yours.
Written for The Royal Art of Homemaking, part of the Salon Gazette.